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Everything You Ever Knew Is Slowly Killing You

by In Some Ways Fine

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1.
We traded luck for dirty looks. It's all a shame, another fools aesthetic. A faux attempt with a foreign tongue. A rendezvous to a bed that's been occupied by more than one. Too quick to decide what is right and that I'm wrong. When you haven't a clue what is going on. Told me to try writing songs about the weather. Well don't you miss the seasons back home? You've got the patience of a saint with zero heart. Cherry picked compliments, bring us closer to the start. (You take what you want, but not what you need. To fill your whole life like a worthless legacy.) You can change a life but cant make up your mind. I've got these confessions but not a lot of time. An accidental conversation, I let it slip. Words I wish I meant but never really fit.
2.
Change the locks, but it won't keep your uninvited advances out of my head. Barricade the door, prove to them that you're in this for the long haul at least for now. It's so predictable, I lost the plans to my escape so many years ago. Circle the block. Your image still haunts me, it's still the last thing I see every night. Your confusing love for comfort. This is my last confession. Gearing up for a brand new first impression. This place feels less like a home. Just a place to keep my things. I've never felt so betrayed by a simple lack of ambition. Sort through the wreckage for anything of value. Not sure what I ever saw in you. My conscience, it floats through the ceiling or my throat. It's not just a trick or a slight of hand.
3.
Anxious 03:50
Woke up from the aftermath, Where the questions linger longer. Am I the product of my father, or the same old version of myself? Just give me a moment, to get my story straight. Because battling against these currents, aren't as difficult as swimming in my head. I refuse to be remembered, for anything I don't deserve. So I'll take a curtain call, for every bad decision that I've ever made. I'll become friends with regret. And carefully retrace my steps, in hope for different results. You can count on me, counting you out. Cus' you can't count on me. You can count on me, counting you out. Cus' you can't count on me. Got a dependence on these chemicals. And now I can't help but feel as if, my bodies failed me now. With a distorted reality and a cognitive approach. You say I'm seeking attention, but you don't even know. To some of us, the nights are too long. To some, the days.
4.
Disguised 03:34
You wear a smile that never fit. A vague disguise. It's so unfit for someone whose got so much pride. The days they turn to weeks And I keep telling myself there's beauty in everything we see. Time it passes faster than our minds can tick. I always miss the silence when there's too much sound. I've spent too long depending on you to keep me standing up straight. But without you I'm afraid my bones will sink straight to the floor. I only tell you what you want to hear. To keep you honest, keep you coming back for more. And that bitter taste it goes well with that chip on your shoulder.
5.
Fill in the blanks with neglect. You are the perfect harmony. In a sad song written by someone else you once claimed you knew. You are not as broken as you pretended to be. Maximized by your strength. Minimized by my weakness. Dissect my head, lay it down right next to you. Feeling overexposed, a slight remorse and under appreciated. Losing faith in hope you love to turn it around and shove right back in my face. Made of nothing but skin and bones yet why do I feel so invisible? Is it too much to ask for? Is it too much to handle? You've got some nerve. It's vicious cycle that's creeping towards the end. I pawned my love to make ends meet and came up empty. Lessons learned. Faces forgotten maybe eventually forgiven. Conceal my insecurities to convince everyone that I'm fine. Because these hard times fall upon deaf ears.
6.
Lost Soul 03:18
You left a blanket and the porch light on again. For any lost soul that needs a home for the night. Should I take this as a blessing or another lie? Or maybe it's a chance for me to set my sights on something new with a fresh set of eyes. Lure me in with your promises of redemption. It's just common courtesy, you can't fool me. A photo finish but whose the first to give in. Maybe it's souvenir for the nights we spent face down. I can't help but to ask, what did you get out of this? Stuck hiding in your shadows, dancing with your ghost. Self medicating, to cope with your absence. Because everything I ever knew is slowly killing me. Slowly killing you.
7.
Misdirection 02:53
Excuse my discretion, it's just a simple form of misdirection. Keep searching for your clever excuse. It's overused. As a matter of fact. It's just blessing in disguise. A face that's worn every expression. Ones that I've learned to despise. The world needs less people like you and more people to look up too. Your just pissing your future away. What do you have to say for yourself? Through these glassy eyes I caught a glimpse of you. The years haven't been too kind to you. I found perspective in your double speak. Every bruise just an added memory. Was it it worth searching for something more exciting to pursue. Is it still considered sinning if it's with someone else's shoes.

credits

released October 7, 2016

Brendan Grover: Guitars, Vocals (barely) Bass, and Drums

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In Some Ways Fine Boston, Massachusetts

Bedroom jams with one guitar and a whole lot of complaining.

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